Hard to believe?

When you spare a make up smile, 

I'm instantly your biggest fan. 

How was I to know, 

That you practiced it beforehand?

Words of wisdom from a pothead.

Its funny how women have been a great inspiration for this blog to run but whats wrong with that anyway.

So a quick introduction; she's insulting, has a mole on her right cheek, drives an old white zen, has a boombox which looks a 34 b boob with no nipples, is a big time pothead(should have begun with that), always has maal on her, loves photography, had red streaks once, met me through another tharkey friend, has cool stitch slippers, is a die hard coldplay fan(could have begun with this too!) and this could be a never ending list so let me move beyond this introduction.

Sometimes I'd completely say something random and then laugh at people around me who'd try to make sense out of it, its a bit disturbing I know but what's funnier is that this chick makes sense out of the all the unorganized thoughts that I'd throw at her, those which after a point start sounding random to me.

It surprises me. 

(2 weeks skipped)

I told her I like her, was pretty sure she liked me back too. How was i sure? Vibes! I believe they are involuntary and they communicate a persons emotional state which is easily felt by others around them.

Her's hit me at the exact same frequency as mine. For me she's become one of the people who's reputation precedes her, when you introduces her to your friends, they already know who she is because you have already talked about her. She nearly ticks all the boxes listed under the perfect girl category.

But is there a break from this vicious cycle of love and destruction and why does it have to come in anyway? cause humans have been designed like that? on the other hand the heartache has its own rate of decay and it hardly coincides with when we think it ought to go. 

But leaving all of this aside, the pothead says "lets go with the flow"  :)

To those days when pictures were taken for memories and not for facebook profiles...

Beauty and brains.

I met this "older woman" (she likes to be called one) who I knew since quite a while but there was this side of hers which I got introduced to lately.

Came again the late night love songs days, trying to find endless meanings and connections to them and honestly this is the first time I can see myself falling for someone who was completely out of the league. She has beauty and brains and not to forget shes older to me yet again a natural age disparity which cannot be helped but some how I never saw it as a hitch to tell her how I feel about her.

There was so much I wanted her to know but she said she couldn’t do it on texts and so couldn’t I.
Before things get muddled she replied in a downbeat which was the boss’s final word !

The next crisis was that I had never be rejected and this one came too rigid on me.

There was no way I could reach her echelon and with this final thought I decided to forget. We had no future.. and from personal experience she didn’t want me to get hurt which I understood or maybe I didn’t..
“tere pyaar ki toh pungii baj gayi hai” said a close friend of mine.. they are all equally shocked to see me in this shape cause they’ve never seen me taking life this sincerely. But this wasn't love, I was attracted to her personality, her taste of music and her work.

I’m sure you’ve heard this story of a man cribbing about not being able to walk properly till God shows him someone who didn’t have legs atall.
Analogously one of my good friend told me his love story which completely distorted my depressive state .. I promised not to share it with anyone.
But again I thought these chattels and talks don’t match her stratum and yet again its pointless thinking of a future with her.
But for her endearing beauty and cerebral brain this is what I found …

Have you ever wished,
you were in her genes?
Pretty as a picture,
but not what she seems.

Have you ever wished,
you could be that smart?
Ideas overflowing,
with no place to park.

Trying to perfect,
every little part.
Always fighting aging,
hoping for a new start.

Off into trivia,
puzzles and games.
Pushing the formula,
to ever higher gains.

Attracting attention,
with every move.
Using sexual tension,
to a higher groove.

Withdrawing from others,
into your shell.
Perfecting the implements,
for your own kind of hell.

Natural selection,
got you this far.
Store-bought selection,
raises the bar.

No one understands,
who you really are.
Looking for love,
that's always too far.

Because you're a star,
of your own making.
A star so misunderstood,
my heart is breaking.
- Ronald W. Hull

The song thats lately been on my mind..

Vishwa Gulati Out with his New Free Style Rap.. Its called I BELONG FROM THE STREETS !

http://www.mediafire.com/file/41w3ftqmykg/Vgkiller Production-I belong from the streets.mp3 .. My freestyle RAP ! ! show me some love

An extract from the book my sister's keeper..

If there was a religion of Annaism,and I had to tell you how humans made their way to earth,it would go like this:in the begining,there was nothing at all but the moon and the sun.And the moon wanted to come out during the day,but there was something so much brighter that seemed to fill up all those hours.The moon grew hungry,thinner and thinner,until she was just a slice of herself,and her tips were as sharp as a knife.By accident,because that is the way most things happen,she poked a hole in the night and out spilled a million stars,like a fountain of tears. Horrified,the moon tried to swallow them up.And sometimes this worked,because she got fatter and rounder.But mostly it didn't,because there were just so many.The stars kept coming,until they made the sky so bright that the sun got jealous.He invited the stars to his side of the world,where it was always bright.What he didn't tell them,though was that in the daytime,they'd never be seen.So the stupid ones leaped from the sky to the ground,and they froze under the weight of their own foolishness. The moon did her best.She carved each of these blocks of sorrow into a man or a woman.She spent the rest of her time watching out so that her other stars wouldn't fall.She spent the rest of her time holding on to whatever scraps she had left.